Blood and Bone
by Gindokei
Summary: Zero wears his earrings to disguise the pain. Short little oneshot about a masochistic Zero. T for slightly disturbing material and vague sexual references.


_Blood and Bone_

**AN: My second **_**Vampire Knight**_** piece. (:**

**Disclaimer: **_**Vampire Knight**_** isn't mine, it's Matsuri Hino-sensei's.**

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**I knew what I was fated to become from the moment I felt Shizuka Hio's puncture marks in my neck.

The knowledge that I was to become one of the creatures I loathed so much filled me with a nameless dread. The dread, strangely enough, did not manifest itself in its usual form of anxiety – instead, it was like a deep, continuous ache in my body, centered around my breastbone. I couldn't escape it, no matter where I went. Nothing could cleanse me of the dread and of the pain.

One year after coming to live with Headmaster Cross, I made my first attempt to erase the pain. I'd found an old earring lying in the room I'd been allotted. It was the type that attached to the top of the ear, the pinna, and was embossed with some design or the other. I didn't bother to ask Headmaster Cross or Yuki about it. All I knew was that this was a way to get rid of the ache.

I found a thin, sterilized needle in the top shelf of the Headmaster's medicine cabinet. I knew perfectly well that he and Yuki have removed all traces of sharp objects from my sight. I also knew that there was no way they could stop me from getting to those objects, if I so wished. I rinsed the needle once and set to work.

I was inexperienced, obviously. I didn't know what to do. The needle bit deep into my skin – I made two holes, seeing as the earring had two stubs to affix into the ear. The pain sang through my veins, but it wasn't enough. I put the earring on and resolved to find another way.

The next year, I found a pair of small silver hoops. This time, Yuki saw me with them and told me they were hers – they'd gotten lost, it seemed, and I'd found them. She didn't mind me having them, she said, and smiled at me. She and the Headmaster hadn't asked me about my first earring. They must have guessed that I wouldn't have told them the truth, anyway.

This time, it was the other ear. I'd kept the needle from the previous time, but I was unsure of its cleanliness – and I certainly didn't want to infect myself. I was already dying, bit by bit, polluted by a much worse disease. I went out and bought a new needle. It wasn't difficult.

Two punctures again – always two punctures. The earrings fixed themselves neatly into my ear. The pain was duller that time, not even close to enough to wipe out the ache. I gave up.

Nothing would get rid of the pain. Nothing would make me forget what I was going to become.

Then Yuki and I entered Cross Academy. Initially, I thought being in close proximity with vampires would heighten the ache, and it did. Every time I saw one – especially Yuki's 'hero', Kaname Kuran – I was reminded not just of what I would become, but also of what I would not become. I would not be a poised aristocrat like the members of the elite Night Class. I would be a Level D, a former human who would swiftly degenerate to Level E, who would swiftly fall to my death.

But at the same time, I found the pain subsiding at intervals. Whenever I saw Yuki smile, when I saw her being pushed over by the girls of the Day Class or when I felt her hands on my forehead, checking my temperature because I'd said something wrong. At those times, the pain would vanish entirely, and I would wonder what exactly I'd done to deserve such a reprieve.

The answer soon became clear. I'd done nothing. It was all Yuki. Her smile, her touch, her warmth coursed through my body like a drug and killed the pain. When it came back, it was weaker, like she'd fought it off for me. I was grateful.

And then slowly, I began to catch tantalizing glimpses of her bare neck or the smooth stretch of her skin over her collarbone. The ache intensified into something new, something foreign, something even more painful.

What is it that that old bard, Shakespeare, said? 'As fire drives out fire,', or something like that? Pain doesn't work that way. Pain doesn't drive out pain. Pain just adds up, until finally, everything comes undone at the simplest of actions.

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**AN: Er... not sure if this was good. Masochistic Zero... just delving into an idea I had about how he got his earrings. Nothing more. ^^;; Constructive criticism would be great!**

**741 words.**


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